The world is your oyster

Honestly, this year hasn't been the easiest for me. A lot of changes have happened. I've become more socially reclusive than I've ever been. I've started to dislike deep conversations because it meant searching myself for answers that I do not have. It means facing questions that I rather not face. I have gone through every emotion possible to a great degree - anger, bitterness, happiness, confusion and the worst of all, indifference. In my opinion, saying "I couldn't be stuffed anymore" is the worst of the lot. It represents the lost of hope, the candle blown. My indifference have caused me to make mistakes that I wish I didn't make. In turn, my indifference have hurt others and myself. And I wish I could take it back but I can't.

Fortunately for me, I'm beginning to get over that phase of my life. This year has been hard because I find myself searching for my own identity once again. Asking the hard questions again - what's my purpose in life, what am I truly living for, how should I define success, what kind of life do I want to lead. And then I began doubting myself - have I been leading my life all wrong the past few years? What could I have been doing with my life? And what should I be doing with my life? Why am I shortchanging myself? Where does my passion lie? Where's my drive to strive and succeed? Am I really who I think I am?

And I'm still searching. Well, at least for now I'm beginning to search for answers in the right places. And most of all, at least I've stopped being indifferent.

The world is my oyster.

I think I will be okay.