My chronic disease

There is one serious flaw about me. I’m a klutz. Seriously.

Today I told myself that I have to try really hard to not drop anything. Failed. Miserably. For example, this afternoon, I took out some ingredients from the fridge to cook fried noodles. While trying to balance a quarter of onion, a carton of eggs and a container in my hands, I almost dropped the eggs on the carpet~! That would have been disastrous. I quickly stuffed the eggs back in the fridge. In the midst of the chaos, I dropped a box of ‘chee cheong fan’ on the carpet. The box plonked open and the soy sauce drenched the carpet and in matrix style, the droplets of soy sauce painted the walls with eeky dark brown stains. My jaw dropped because that meant hard work. I hate cleaning the carpet. I cleaned it last week because wine was spilled on the carpet. And a few weeks before because I broke my eye shadow and the loose powder stained the carpet. Anyway, I quickly grabbed the stain remover cleaner and odour removal cleaner. Surprise, surprise, I dropped one of the bottles on the floor. Was absolutely disgusted with myself. And just a couple of minutes ago, I dropped my pen, and literally 30 seconds later, my laptop adapter. “Very lady-like,” was what a friend of mine commented the other day as I stumble over a chair.

As I was frustratingly blotting out the glaring stains, I remember telling myself that I would learn to be less of a klutz when I was a little kid. That meant not dropping food all over the floor and table every single dinner. haha. Never worked. I remember holding a bowl of fried rice and just dropping the entire bowl on the floor. And toppling my entire bowl of cereal on the floor. Actually, I thought I was quite smart because I intelligently placed the bean bag over the evidence. I was quite proud of my deceitful plan. Little did I realise that I was the only one in the household eating Kellogg’s sugar cornflakes.

This klutziness is like a chronic disease I tell you. It’s something I can’t get rid off. Oh well, my saving grace is that I have reasonably good reflexes. I can’t recall the number of times I almost humiliated myself by almost tripping down the stairs or being a split-second away from falling on a FLAT road. Most times, I manage to regain my dignity by holding onto the railings and acting all adult about it – which is of course, pretending that the last 10 seconds were wiped out from history.

Sigh. How now brown cow?