Rant Rant Rant

11.14 pm

88.3%.

11.7% more to go. I’m downloading a movie to watch now. My mind is restless. So I’m hoping a movie will keep me company till it’s time to fall into the slumber of dreams. I’ve written about 4 blog entries, yet none of them seem to capture exactly how I feel right now. I can tell you what it encapsulates – fear, solitude and the meaning of love. Perhaps, I will look through them again one day soon and publish them.


11.20 pm

4.9% to go. I’m feeling better than how I was 6 minutes ago. I thought about the wonderful people I’m surrounded with and how blessed I am.

I thought bout our late night/early morning chat, how I complained and grumbled and sulked about how life is so unfair. And I kept asking you the whys and hows even when I knew the answers to my questions. There were no answers. I’m spoilt that way. But at that point in time, I wanted those moments to be mine. I felt that I deserved to be bratty. Why? Because life was unfair to me, I thought. At least that was how I felt for that few hours till the sky was painted with pink soft strokes and I fell into unconsciousness. Thankfully, I woke up with a clearer head the next day.

And how you cooked dinner for me. Yes, me! I haven’t had anyone cook dinner for me in ages, save mum and dad. A home-cooked meal was very much welcomed, needless to say. It was better than eating out in over-priced restaurants. And it’s way better than anything I’ve cooked in the past few weeks.
Thank you.

I will stop here for now. Download has completed. I’m watching Closer.

2.47 am
I was done with Closer a while ago. But I’m still not able to fall into the slumber of dreams. Sigh.